I once went out with a guy for a week. I say Went Out. But it was really just a whirlwind romance that lasted, well, a week.

We met through mutual friends. Instant attraction. Saw each other every day, any chance we got. Before work, in between work, after work… We just couldn’t get enough of each other.

Then, after a week… Nothing.

A couple of strangers staring at each other across a restaurant table, left with dregs of a tornado been and gone, wondering what the hell happened.

The break-up was quick and amicable. We ate. He paid. He dropped me off. But before we parted, he made me promise one thing.

ONE-WEEK STAND (OWS):  Swear you’ll never write about this?

ME: Huh?

OWS: Promise I won’t open the paper one day to find a story about “us”.

ME: Why the paranoia? Are you a spy?

OWS: No. You are.

To read more: Go to Tyler Weaver’s Multi-Hyphenate

Last week I was proud and happy to announce my debut on the spanking-new blogozine, Multi-Hyphenate, with a classic stalker story.

"Why I Hate Lucy" - TV Sitcom

My thanks and gratitude to Tyler Weaver for the chance to share my twisted story and for making my first experience a damn fine one.

So here it is, as posted on Multi-Hyphenate.

WRITING & ME: A STALKER STORY

I could tell you these contributions will provide writers with sure-fire ways on how to score an agent, get published, produced, become rich and famous.

But I’d be lying. Plus I’m not that kind of contributor.

I have no formulas. Or answers. Just stories.

Stories that might help you make some sense of the whole darn thing or at the very least, provide a good laugh.

Also, I’ve kinda been around. Not in a slutty sort of way – though that case might be argued and is best reserved for another blog. But creatively, if I think about it, I am in my own right, a walking, talking, constantly evolving – well, one can only hope – multi-hyphenate. And one way or another, have managed to earn an income from writing and all things related to it for over 15 years.

So why did you choose to write?

This question evokes a mindless stare that translated into words would go something like: Are you out of your frigging mind? Who would choose to be isolated, insecure, jolted by voices in the middle of the night demanding your pen (or tips of fingers on keyboard) serve as their tongue, and generally psychotic?

I have attempted escape, taken out numerous restraining orders. Tried my hand at other professions. But writing – relentless stalker that it is – has managed to track me down and hold me prisoner.

I guess the tragedy really began at age 7, when I wrote my first novel. It went for 20 pages which when you’re that age, is equivalent to War and Peace.

My parents never ceased to remind me writing was a hobby, not a profession.

So I got my first job as a travel writer for a Malaysian tourist magazine. And from there, proceeded to work for a daily newspaper and a bunch of lifestyle magazines. Pretty soon I was freelancing and found myself writing everything from advertorials and copy, to entertainment reviews for local theatre and performing arts.

Most of the plays I saw sucked and I knew I could do better. So I wrote my first play, Color Blind. Co-founded a company called Kuali Works (Kuali in Malay means Wok) with another writer, Ann Lee – who still runs the company. And produced my play.

Also, we decided Malaysia really needed its first all-women arts company so Kuali Works – that specialized in theatre, television and publishing, employed only women and trained them from the ground up.

I also decided to direct Color Blind, which was a harrowing experience and swore would never do it again until I wrote my second play, LightBulbs and directed that.

A black comedy about Malaysia’s first female serial killer, LightBulbs got a full house every night and became a cult hit. So I entered it into the New York Fringe Arts Festival and became the first Malaysian playwright to be produced there in 1998.

In the meantime, I got contracted to write plays for other directors and became Playwright In Residence at a local theatre. A dream come true.

I should probably have stayed and capitalized on the glory. But I felt like a hack – undeserving of the sudden success and certain I was just a big fish in a small pond. Also, I needed to learn more. Also, I fell in love – groan. So I moved to New York. Well Jersey City to be precise.

But managed to score a gig as Foreign Arts Correspondent for Citibank Magazine Malaysia and got to review plays and films and restaurants in NYC, which was pretty cool. Plus while I was there, my agent back home scored me a writing gig on a local TV sitcom. So I felt pretty contented… Until life happened. As it does.

Found myself pregnant and my partner got transferred to Italy. And so we moved and I gave birth in Italian, which was an interesting experience.

But three months after the baby was born, I was back in Malaysia, a single mum, jobless. And to top it off, my baby was denied a visa to stay. In my own country.

After two years of TV writing and fighting for my daughter’s visa, I decided it was time to give up the ghost and applied for permanent residency to Australia, whereupon my parents again took the opportunity to remind me, Writing Is A Hobby. I had a child now. It was time to grow up.

This time I agreed. And so I did – grow up.

I became a sales rep for a company specializing in reference material for schools, and became quite successful at it until my back went out as I was lifting, which saw me in physiotherapy and unable to walk for 5 months.

When I was finally able to drive, found myself mysteriously swerving into the Australian Film, TV & Radio School (AFTRS) which takes only 3-4 screenwriters a year.

The following year I found myself one of three students accepted into the Graduate Diploma course for screenwriting. And in the next two years, got to write short films, create my own TV sitcom – Why I Hate Lucy , and script-edited several episodes of an original TV drama series.

And when I graduated, found to my amazement I had been awarded a post-graduate scholarship with Southern Star Entertainment, which was a great honor and a wonderful learning experience.

And to be honest, I thought this was it. This was my second chance.

But it wasn’t. Well, it was and then it wasn’t. I landed a gig on a TV drama, but the story producers changed and the new one didn’t like me and thought my work sucked and the recession hit and suddenly there I was again – jobless, with a daughter halfway through primary school, skilled at nothing but words.

Such is the nature of our business, of life. It doesn’t just apply to Hollywood. It’s everywhere.

I’m lucky Writing is the relentless stalker that it is. I’m not sure I would have maintained the resilience I needed otherwise.

Sometimes resilience is all we need.

For as my journey continues like one tumultuous wave after another, I would like to tell you it gets easier. That after being validated and published and produced, that I feel less of a hack and more secure.

But it doesn’t. And I don’t.

What I do know is this: I am a writer.

I write not because I want to but because I have to.

Life experience is not a bad thing. It is what informs my writing.

And I am undeniably Multi-Hyphenated – though far better and happier at some hyphenates than others.

I wonder – If your creative/professional path were translated into a story, what would it be? A War story? A Western? A Detective Story with a twist? Or just a good old-fashioned Love Story?

So thrilled.

This month I get to write for two blogs – both distinct and wonderful in their own right.

First is Tyler Weaver’s “perpetually hyphenated, highly opinionated, endlessly creative” blogozine – Multi-Hyphenate. Which is basically where creative people from all walks of life with split personalities go to read about other creative people from all walks of life with split personalities.

The new Multi-Hyphenate (MH) is about to head into its third week and so far the response has been promising and well-deserved. It’s so courageous yet alarmingly insane of Tyler to have turned his personal blog into a blogozine daily featuring guest writers from all artistic disciplines.

I am extremely excited – and a touch nervous – about guest-blogging for the very first time and making my debut on MH this Wednesday, Feb 10, with a post entitled Writing & Me: A Stalker Story – about how despite several escape attempts and numerous restraining orders, Writing refuses to leave me alone.

I’m even more excited – and deeply honored – to be debuting in the same week as the positive and wonderfully encouraging TV & film-producing husband and wife team, Joke and Biagio, who will special guest-blog Monday, Feb 8. As in today.

I only discovered Joke and Biagio’s fantastic blog weeks ago. Can’t believe it’s been sitting there all this time, bustling with tales from the trenches and their various productions – Beauty and the Geek, Dying To Do Letterman, Scream Queens – and I knew nothing about it. I look forward with keen anticipation to their contribution on MH and what they have to say about the biz.

The second blog I will be contributing to this month is a different beast entirely. (And I mean “beast” in the most complimentary of ways.)

Leslee Horner’s daily blog -  Waiting For The Click.

Leslee is a “wife, mother, writer, and seeker” who has decided to share her thoughts and experiences in the hope of reaching out and assuring her readers, they are not alone.  She is a blogger who come rain or shine, will post a poem or her reflections of each day gone by, and whom I have long admired for her eloquence and dedication.

Following the sad passing of her best friend last year, Leslee asked friends and readers for contributory stories about A-ha moments in their lives. And so it is with great pleasure that I share such a story on Leslee’s blog come 18th Feb. So stay tuned. And CLICK.

Thank you Tyler and Leslee for affording me the honor and opportunity to crash in your respective spaces. I hope you will not regret it and would love to crash again – hint, hint.

And one final thank you.

To the person who showed me how to set up those dominoes and advised me to start blogging and get networking online 8 months ago at the Santa Fe Screenwriting Conference.

Marvin V. Acuna of The Business Of Show Institute (BOSI), who has shared with me and so many other writers the wisdom of  building an inventory of work, having several things on the boil at the same time, thinking of ourselves as CEOs of our own company, and always, always Networking – Palm Up.

Thank you Marvin. If not for you, none of this would be happening.

On that note, if anyone is guesting or inviting people to guest on their blog, or has anything else coming up, feel free to leave a comment and Plug It. And as my dear friend Jeanne likes to say, Plug It Good.

If, on the other hand, you just want to leave praise and obscene flattery, well, that’s okay too. I am after all a writer and writers as we well know have egos the size of China that need constant feeding.

So Plug and/or Feed. Click. And Click Again.

Thank You.

(Oh, and if you leave comments on the other blogs, I’ll be sure to respond – just like here.)

I feel so guilty right now.

A while back the mysterious librarian, Jenny Martin, aka Scarlet Whisper, sent me a message. She had posted a Kreative Blogger Award list on her humorous, delicious and always relevant blog, Book Binge – http://jmartinlibrarian.wordpress.com/

And I was on it. Wow.

Apologies to Jenny as I didn’t realize with this came responsibility until I received the same honor from Sheri on her highly perceptive and bullshit-intolerant blog, The Uneasy Writer – http://theuneasywriterdiaries.blogspot.com/ – stating the following rules:

1. Copy and paste the pretty picture which you see on the top left corner onto your own blog.
2. Thank the person who gave you the award and post a link to their blog.
3. Write 7 things about yourself we do not know.
4. Choose 7 other bloggers to award.
5. Link to those 7 other bloggers.
6. Notify your 7 bloggers.

Note: Sheri also has a second blog called The Fashion Autopsy – http://fashionautopsy.blogspot.com/ – which I ADORE and is a must-read for anyone who appreciates a professional, though original and highly humorous take on the latest looks to adorn the runway.

When I first started this blog, did not expect anyone to read it, let alone post a comment, let alone think of awarding it anything.

Big thanks to Jenny and Sheri, deeply grateful. Apologies for my tardiness. All I can say is NaNoWriMo. That sucker drained the life out of me.

And now, 7 things about self that you might not know.

1. I am a single mum.

2.When I was 16, after reading Henry Miller’s Tropic of Cancer and Anais Nin’s The Delta of Venus, was convinced I was the reincarnation of Henry and Anais’ unborn child – deadly serious.

3.I never trust people I just met who say Trust Me.

4.I lock myself out of my house or car at least once a month.

5.Gray is my favorite color to wear, it cheers me up.

6.Upon completion of a script or story, like to head-bang to Blister In The Sun by Violent Femmes.

7. I hate Christmas.

As they recently received my undivided praise and pimping in a previous post – Day 19/Thanks/Pimp List: Humbled & In Awe – I have decided to look beyond the usual suspects and friends, which leaves out many blogs I visit on a regularly basis, that are on my blog roll and which I so dearly enjoy. I have also chosen not to include well-established blogs as they do not require the publicity or recognition.

And so the following are blogs that have come to my attention from afar, one way or another. Blogs in which – unbeknown to the talented yet unsuspecting souls behind them – I have been sniffing and lurking for some time now, and believe to be deserving of encouragement and recognition:

1. WRITE LIKE YOU’RE NAKED – http://d-jordan-knight.blogspot.com/

Wickedly funny and intelligent, this blog promises great reads. Be it about the desire for a “fucking cigarette”, musings on spam -  edible or otherwise, or just plain old existence, D. Jordan Knight’s posts pack a punch. The author is a former humor columnist who presently works as freelance writer and coach. Her work has appeared in print and digital media throughout the world. Current projects include a feature length screenplay, co-written with Zac Sanford (Suntaur Entertainment).

2. MULTI-HYPHENATE – http://multihyphenate.blogspot.com/

Here you will find pontifications of the most amusing caliber pertaining to TV, film, writing, and entertainment. The latest post entitled “The Rising Phoenix of Aesthetically Pleasing Toilet Plungers” highlights the author’s amusing compulsion to hold on to the dying form that is the DVD. The author is Tyler Weaver, filmmaker and TV critic who has excellent taste in movies and music, and most recently bedazzled me with his proficiency in all things Tom Waits.

3. WAITING FOR THE CLICK – http://lesleehorner.wordpress.com/about/

Leslee Horner describes herself as “a wife, mother, writer, and seeker”. She is also the most dedicated and disciplined blogger I know. If you care to check out her blog, will find that she posts DAILY. Yep, every day, a new and interesting post. Leslee gathers inspiration from her daily life, the people around her, as well as current happenings. And expresses her thoughts with a level of sincerity and eloquence that is hard to come by.

4. GOTTA STOP KILLIN’… MAYBE NOT – http://assassingrl.wordpress.com/

Assassin Grl is hot, mean and only out to get ya if you’re a moron or Roman Polanski. Her posts are invariably related to killing or things that put her in a killing mood and also include thoughts on writing and Twitter. She also recently completed National Novel Writing Month and her book, about (yes you guessed it) an assassin called Madison Cooke, is currently begging for a title.

5. THE PASSWORD IS SWORDFISH – Ruminations on Film, Life, and The Unimportant Things In Between – http://thepasswordisswordfish.wordpress.com/

The author, Russell Hainline, humbly refers to himself as “an aspiring writer” – though I would say he most definitely is one. Russell is currently working on his Masters in Theatre History, Literature, and Criticism at The Ohio State University. His reviews are deftly written with a refreshing clarity, honesty and an unquestionable love for the big screen. His most recent reviews include Zombieland, New Moon and 2012.

6. SENSIBLE UNSENSIBLE http://unsensible.wordpress.com/2009/05/

A blog full of really cool poems that don’t try to be anything they’re not, don’t make your head spin and don’t drown in self-imposed abstract imagery to the detriment of author and reader. In fact, the poems on this blog have quite the opposite effect. They make you want to shout, Yeah baby! They make you laugh and breathe a sigh of relief. The author is Justin Something, dad of 3 and a marketer writer with an interest in arts, media, and tech phenomena who describes himself as a “reflective itinerant dreamer”. And a clever one at that.

7. RANDOM OENOPHILE http://random-oenophile.blogspot.com/

Finally. A blog about wine and food, restaurants and vineyards, that is totally accessible and doesn’t require you to spend copious amounts of money. The author, Cecilia Dominic describes herself as “a thirty-something professional in Atlanta with literary aspirations.” Her goal – “to write the blog that I’ve always wanted to read: musings on wines, food, restaurants, and other topics by someone with no professional training in the culinary fields.” Totally recommended for anyone who enjoys a good affordable bite or a good affordable drop or a good read about a good bite or drop. You get the idea.

Congratulations Bloggers!

What are you still doing here? Go blog!

I recently attended a screenwriter’s group where two new members – extremely brave albeit suicidal writers, submitted their work for collective critiquing.

This was my first time too, but I lacked Courage. There wasn’t a chance in hell I’d submit my first draft to a bunch of strangers.

A week before the meeting, all members were sent the first-30 pages of both scripts.

As I read them, began to wonder: I’d never met these people. How straightforward could I be? And what would be the point if I couldn’t be honest?

I decided to make notes and wait till I met the writers in person. For all I knew, they could be psychopaths. After the meeting, I might find them lurking in the shadows of the parking lot – with a knife.

During the meeting I watched closely as others voiced opinions and the writers listened.

The first script was your classic commercial disaster movie. Well structured, but predictable. The characters, gross cliches. Though keeping in mind it was the writer’s first attempt at a screenplay and his first draft, it showed promise.

Going around the circle of a dozen odd members proved to be an interesting exercise.

Some members gave detailed notes and went so far as to suggest another character say such and such line, and what they thought should happen instead of such-and-such on Page 13 and so on. While others went for a broader approach, highlighting what they viewed as strengths and weaknesses.

I thought about what I would find constructive were I that writer.

Some people had comments like This reminds of this movie, which I have never found useful. So my script reminds you of Die Hard 3. What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Jump off a building?

One person suggested he throw in lots of red herrings to trick the audience, which I thought was a terrible idea. Is there anything worse than reading a script that takes you up one garden path after another, only to unveil an anti-climax ending which makes you want to simultaneously throw up, scream and strangle the fraud responsible?

Others asked questions which the writer could or couldn’t answer, which I thought was the most useful – in so far as it informed the writer how well he did or didn’t know his characters and story.

Where the writer was concerned, I have to say he was impressively receptive and open. I doubt I would’ve taken some of those comments as well he did. Even when you could tell he didn’t agree, he nodded respectfully and jotted it down. For all we knew, he was telling us all to go screw ourselves, but I doubt it. I got the impression he found the exercise genuinely useful and was taking what he needed – smart.

When my turn came around, I decided to give it to him straight-up. I decided he could take it.

And so praised his formatting, the way in which he set up the world. But told him exactly what I thought about the characters. They were stereotypes,  inauthentic, even racist. They had to drive the action and not the other way round, to which he nodded and scribbled profusely and seemed truly appreciative.

Again, he could have been writing Fuck You. But it didn’t seem like it.

So that went well.

Then we came to the second script, which was in many ways the antithesis to the first. The characters were insightful and sensitively written, but it didn’t read like a script. There was hardly any white space on the page. One character’s dialogue rambled for almost a page. And after 30 pages, I still hadn’t a clue what the protagonist wanted or what the story was about.

As much of an oxymoron as this may sound, it was like reading a David Lynch script that made absolutely no sense.

The feedback started. Around the circle we go.

Now, this writer was a tall quiet woman. Soft-spoken. She had her laptop on her knees and after the previous writer’s feedback, waited in positive anticipation, an optimistic smile on her face.

Until the first member of the group opened his mouth. He held no punches. I thought the characters were boring. Why should I care? Who’s going to make this? Why are you telling this story?

As it continued, relentless, unflinching, I saw that smile vanish from her sweet face. Her head drooped slowly over that keyboard, a wilting flower. Her fingers stood numb. She shrunk right before our very eyes.

I could almost hear her wailing inside and thought to myself, I can’t do it. I can’t tell her what I honestly think.

As we proceeded around the circle, some people who were obviously sympathetic, went easy and focused on the positive. Your writing is beautiful, the description so powerful, I love your use of adjectives in this sentence… Even if some of it screamed Scraping The Barrel, it was worth it just to see her eyes flicker, if only with an ounce of hope.

Others charged on, business as usual. Where is this going? What are you trying to say? What is your character’s goal? To which the poor writer whispered, She wants to escape.

By the time my turn came around, it was obvious this writer had come here for very different reasons to the first one.

She had not come to listen to straightforward comments and ruthless questions about her work. She had come for a pat on the back, maybe some validation. The first writer hadn’t required validation. He wanted frank thoughts and got just what he needed.

I decided to give the second writer what she needed. Encouragement. Then pointed out her script didn’t look like a script and the formatting, all wrong. But this came after a string of positives and so she took it with a smile and even laughed when I suggested there might be something wrong with her Final Draft software and if so, she was entitled to a refund.

However, when the session came to an end and the group adjourned to the local pub to say what they really thought – ha, the second writer’s absence was duly noted.

Apparently she had another function to attend but I didn’t buy it. Somehow I held an image of her, huddled in fetal position in the dark, burning her script, slashing her wrists.

A fellow writer checked on her the next day and though recovering, she is very much alive and kicking.

Whether or not she shows up to more meetings remains to be seen.

And will she share her work again? I hope so.